Being a mom is my most rewarding role, but also my most challenging. It keeps me up and down like a rollercoaster. I’m sure all parents out there can agree. One moment, parenthood is at an all-time high, then boom! The lows. I have 3 children, and, ironically, they are all Sagittarians. When I say all Sags, I’m talking about all 3 of their birthdays falling within seven days. I still haven’t figured out how that all happened, lol.
However, even though their zodiac signs are the same. They are all different; I’m talking about day, afternoon, and night. I used to ask, how people with more than one child handled all the different personalities; it was very intimidating. Obviously not that intimidating because I have 3 in my household now!
Anyway, these little people of mine (two are not little anymore, and it makes me sad) really pushed me to grow, and I grew in ways I did not see myself growing. Each one of my girls suffers from a mental health disorder. General Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and Major Depressive Disorder (MDD). Most people in my life at the time of their diagnosis assumed that because I was a healthcare professional, I automatically knew how to deal with someone with these diagnoses. I would like to say, stop assuming! I had to first take my healthcare hat off, educate myself from a family perspective, and get into therapy myself to help me understand my feelings. Those steps allowed me to continue to learn, understand, and accept. Once all of this was accomplished, I figured out how to parent my children.
In transition, I realized I needed a different parenting style for each child. For one child, I needed to allow them to make their own mistakes, fall, and get bruised. I could not be a protective parent for this child. I could only be there to mend their wounds. For another child, I had to be a protective parent. I had to be gentle, give lots of prep talks; she is the one who actually made me realize we needed to connect more as a family. She’s guarded and takes on the weight of the world. Gentle communication goes far. Lastly, my youngest child requires freedom. I allow him to be as free as can be! He knows the rules and does not often break them. But he needs to have freedom for creativity and thoughts. Our conversations happened more often than on Saturdays because he’s still in his ID stage.
I say all this to say, all these things that I’ve learned on my parenting journey have helped me be a better person. I’m better in all my other roles because of it. All the ups and downs were worth it. Because the outcome is amazing. One of the most important things I have learned as a parent is being true to who I am and allowing my children to do the same! Our greatest contribution to the world is the humans we procreated and helped grow.
